Get More of What You Want – Express Appreciation

As leaders we sometimes miss an obvious opportunity to acknowledge our employees or the members of our teams. Yet any time we see them, we have an opportunity to express our appreciation.  Appreciation is a sincere compliment, freely given and clearly expressed. A compliment, no matter how sincere, will fall flat if it isn’t what the recipient wants to hear. If you complement Sally on her neatly organized office and miss that her financial projections are always dead on, you are going to insult her.

Take the time to ask each member of your team, “What do you want me to notice more about your contributions to team?” Then be on the lookout for an opportunity to express appreciation. You always get more of what you acknowledge. People are thrilled when you acknowledge something for which they want to be known and will produce more of the same behavior. You must express interest and really listen for appreciation to work. The only way you can fail is to ignore what they told you.

If you want to do something that will surprise your team, call a team meeting. Then ask each person to express to the team what they want the team to appreciate about them.  You’d be amazed at the shift that occurs in each person as they reveal how they wish to be known to each other. The relationships within the team begin to change almost immediately as they begin to express their need for acknowledgment. Once the need is expressed it can be met.

I’ve done this a couple of times with teams that were stuck in storming. They moved quickly out of storming and into norming (http://bit.ly/3iQlcg) as their awareness of each other and respect for each other grew. This simple exercise jump-started the process.

Don’t be surprised when the team asks you, “What do you want us to appreciate about you?” It is a humbling experience. Be prepared to give them an answer.

Best wishes for your success!

Leslie

This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 27th, 2009 at 8:59 pm and is filed under Team, leadership. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.